Girl power, Love, life & everything's else in between, motivation and inspiration, personal

#QOTD #35

Keeping up with the lessons learned from fairytales and gaining a better understanding as to why I’m so drawn to one particular fairytale (Cinderella) more than the rest, here’s another quote I simply adore. 

The greatest risk any of us will take, is to be seen as who we are.

~ Cinderella 

The greatest and most rewarding risk I say.

I truelly believe that we are only free, once we don’t allow what people think of us, affect us.

In a world that demands you to think, feel, look and act in a certain way, it’s becoming more and more difficult to see somebody stay true to who they are. And when you do, it is just simply amazing. 

We all go through a phase where we lose sleep over what others may think or say about us. That phase where we will do or wear a certain thing just to fit in. If you’ve never been affected by this, lol kudos to you. But I can definitely relate.

Now though, I really couldn’t be bothered with what folk have to say because remaining true to my self and who I am will always take first presidence! 

I do whatever feels good within my soul, even if it doesn’t fit the norm or standards of society. I wear whatever feels good on the day, whether it’s tracks, a tee and slops or whether it’s the prettiest dress with the cutest of sandals. I brush my hair when I feel like and then other days I don’t bother. My make up will be on fleek some days and then on others, I leave the house make-upless ( not sure if that’s a word but it’s fitting). I do what I need to do for ME and never have I been more comfortable in my own skin. 
I also have been really insecure about my weight. It’s a struggle I’ve been battling out for years now. This still bothers me from time to time however, I’ve realized that if I can’t love myself the way I am now, how do I expect anybody else to love me the way that I am and so whilst losing weight to be healthier is still a thing to do, I’m learning to love myself the way that I currently am, curves, extra rolls and all!
It’s an amazing feeling, not being consumed by what other people think, say or feel when it comes to you. I reckon when and only when you’re comfortable and happy with yourself are you then able to be happy and comfortable and around and with others.

  1. Be who you are meant to be. 
  2. BeYOUtiful. 
  3. Be the original version of yourself and not a copy of somebody else. It’s worth loads more! 

You were put on this earth for a purpose, stay true to that purpose. For there will only ever be one you! 

❤️|💡and 🌈 from just an ordinary girl 

Go on with your exclusive self (: 

Love, life & everything's else in between, motivation and inspiration

Lessons of 2016

Let me share something with ya:
What people think about you is none of your business… I say this because when folk intend on disliking you, nothing you ever do will be enough, they’re gonna keep disliking you for their own reasons no matter what you do. It’s not about you, it’s about their insecurities so don’t lose sleep over it! 

We live in messed up times, people thrive on negativity, darkness and scandal. Everything fair no longer exists. Everything real is becoming extinct. Relationships are all for titles and social media posts or hashtags. Rumors spread wilder than world peace. We focus more on our eye brows being on fleek or the length of our weave than our fellow human beings who don’t even know when or where their next meal is coming from. We live is superficial times. We live in scary times. We live in messed up times indeed.

I say : Hold your head up high, live, learn and laugh through it all and remain ray Charles to the BS. keep growing and bettering yourself. When God is at the center of your world , you find that you will always strive to do the right thing even when or if you fail at times. 

Don’t mime people, how you react to a situation will say a lot about you. Not every interaction needs a reaction. You don’t have to do to others what they do to you. Smile. wave and kill them with kindness or just be still…it will make em go insane.

Learn to self validate so you don’t need others to do it for you. Learn to love yourself so you won’t be phased by those who make an effort to run you down. Irrelevant folk don’t deserve any power over you. 

So shine bright like the diamond that you are because those who matter don’t mind and those who mind don’t matter. It should always be between you and God, eff what the haters say. As I always say, a queen never leaves her throne to address peasants throwing stones 😎 and neither does a king. 

Deuces to all the she devils thinking they know your struggle or story. Tell em to Keep talking now!

And salute to the realist team; family and friends who know our stories, struggles and flaws and who still love us anyway. 👊🏼

Some advice from just an ordinary human being. 

Love, life & everything's else in between, motivation and inspiration, personal


In a world where everything is spiraling out of control, the one thing we need to keep is our dignity and and real connections. 

When I was going through my divorce, I often heard the 80/20 rule philosophy. I didn’t quite understand it until recently. 

What I can definitely say is that I was under the impression that this philosophy only applied to boyfriend&girlfriend/husband&wife relationships…And how wrong was I. 

This philosophy can pretty much apply to ANY relationship and I fell victim, no, wait! Not victim because I AM a VICTOR, I’ll rather say that I experienced this both in a husband&wife relationship but also in relationships out side of this relation. 

Just to touch base, the 80/20 rule in relationships is as below: 

“It is the  belief that in a relationship, you’ll never get 100% of what you want, so at most you get 80%. But some other person may come along and have that missing 20% you don’t have. Some folks fall for the 20% just to realize they should’ve stayed with their original 80%.”

When you witness being “replaced” for a lack of a better word, it is emotionally draining. One literally feels lower than the scum of the earth itself and your mind just keeps running marathons. You and self have endless conversations about everything but find resolution to not a thing. 

 What I’ve learnt through my experiences though, is that if anything is meant to be, it will be so Let them go and let God! 

He found his “2-slice” chick or his ” Betty with the good hair” and they found their ” fun friends” who just ” go with the flow” ? Good on them. One thing to never do is compromise who you are to make them want to stay. It’s a mistake we often make in hope of mending our relationships. 

If he or anybody can’t accept you for who you are, flaws and all, then  I guess they really don’t deserve you and are actually doing you a favor by leaving.

Sure they may find fault and judge and point out all of your flaws and sure they will remind you about all the things YOU need to change and give their 101 excuses, take it like water off a ducks back, pray, change the things that can be changed and pray for wisdom to accept the things that can’t … I guess they do all of that  to make themselves feel better? 

Whilst I’m still yet to find out if they really do regret choosing the 20%’s, I’ve learnt to love myself unconditionally in the interim. God made no mistakes when he made me.

So, in a nutshell:

  • Keep your dignity and love yourself, and
  • Treasure the people who tolerate you day in and day out and love you even on your worse day… it’s very rare to find such these days for:

Posted by just an ordinary girl.