Girl power, Lifestyle, Love, life & everything's else in between, motivation and inspiration, personal

#QOTD #71: Consideration

My sister had this quote up a couple of days ago on her feed.

Let’s just say that I found it to be so profound that days later, I still remembered it.

I think it’s fitting to share It with you all and especially on this #chooseday morning

And our Quote of the day is:

Wash the plate not because it is dirty, not because you are told but because you love the person who will use it next.

~ Mother Teresa

I personally think that you don’t even necessarily need to love the the person who will use it next, you just have to be considerate or respect them enough to make their life or job or situation a little easier.

You can practice the essence of this quote in your every day life.

  • At home and even at work, make the lives of the cleaning staff easier; wash up after yourself, if you spill, wipe it up.
  • If you’re at the printer and you’re almost out of paper, fill the tray once you’re done.
  • If you work in an environment where you have interactions with clients that you need to log, leave clear and precise notes to make the life of the next person easier.
  • In the toilet, replenish the toilet paper if you finish it. keep the condition of the 🚽 and even the 🚿 or the 🛀 as how you would use it.
  • You see something in way that could cause harm, pick it up or move it away.
  • Get home early, start the cooking!

And the list really can go on.

It really is the little things that make the hugest impact.

Share this post and add ways that you can make someone’s life easier. Let consideration be the order of this week 🙌🏼

May the week be filled with loads of love, happiness, peace and opportunity. Aaameen

💗 and 🌈 always , from just an ordinary girl💋

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Girl power, Love, life & everything's else in between, motivation and inspiration, personal

Woman: which one are you? 

So today, I’m sharing a quote that came to me whilst I was writing this post. I’ve been seeing the behavior of some women outchea together with doing some self reflection and that got me 💭. So here it goes…

If you know me, you’d know that I am all about empowering people, women especially. I believe us women are Devine species, we have power. We birth nations. We subtle yet fierce. We are plan makers. We’re strong, both emotionally and physically. We endure with a smile and well the list of how awesome I think we are can go on for days.


We often are quick to call out men and deem them trash, some of whom rightly deserve such tags. But let me tell you about the two kinds of women on this earth because honestly, some of us are beneath trash!

You get the woman who knows her power, she knows that she can do what men can do, but chooses not to because she knows that her Devine purpose was not to be like men. She knows that her devine purpose is to be something more powerful; support, companionship, compassion, fierce, teachers of the home, of the nation!

What she does, she knows that nobody, not even men can do. She knows that men have a purpose and so do women and so she’s only concerned with being the best she can be in fulfilling that purpose. (I aspire to be just like this)

Then you get the woman who THINKS she knows her power and Inturn misuses it. The one who judges and looks down upon her fellow sisters, the one who is more consumed with being in competition for worldly things than actually getting her eish in order. The one who is arrogant and feels like the world owes her. The one who will encourage ruthless behavior just to prove a point to validate herself. ( I’m guilty of some of these things, I never encourage ruthless behavior and I don’t compete though!) 

Women can destroy, as easily as they can build nations. 

~ me


We will never be equal to men because then we’d need to be compared to them and really! There’s no comparison.
Men were put on this earth to carry out their own set of purposes; head their homes, provide for their families,  Protect their loved ones, Persue their person of honour etc. It really wouldn’t be fair to compare! 

If we can just go back to the basics (of understanding men and women were put on this earth for different purposes) for a second, lots of things can be changed. It’s effects can be powerful. 

If we can raise women who know their power as opposed to thinking they know their power or misusing it, things like affairs, divorces, broken homes etc. will minimize. If we go back to being okay with what our sole purpose is, and force men into fulfilling what they’ve been put on this earth to do (by not settling for less) we would not have the repercussions of kids acting out coz their fathers are nowhere to be seen. Abuse to women and children will minimize and the world will just be a more respectful place to live in.  Utopian you may say? I say say it starts with you and I. 

Imagine, all this lies in the power of a woman and the choice of how she will use her God-given power. 

And no honey, God will never send you somebody else’s husband. Having an affair should not give your airs and graces about yourself. You should not feel like you’ve “won” because men aren’t prizes, and your fellow women are not your enemies. Also, gaining anything in this world on anything but merit should not make you feel proud. 

Always think, if what you do to others were to be done unto you, how would you feel. If it’s not good, you know what to do.

|Love yourself |respect yourself |Own your power |Go!


Observations from just an ordinary girl 

Love, life & everything's else in between, motivation and inspiration, personal

#QOTD #29

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Mother Teresa once said:

If you want to change the world, Go home and love your family.

I came across this quote and it actually got me sitting and self-reflecting. It was for this reason that I had to share it.

The world is moving in a very different direction, a selfish one if I can. It’s moving away from sentimentality and more towards a superficial nature. The dynamic of family is no longer what it used to be and that is such a shame.

How many great memories do we have growing up? Do you think that our kids will have the same?

We often have big dreams in terms of the contributions we want to make to the world, starting up our own businesses, blogs, setting up NGO’s, plans to study or travel even. We spread messages of good will, positivity, love and unity  which is all fantastic, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that and kudos to you if you’re doing this because it is needed!

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Question is! do we put that much effort towards the goodwill of our family?

How many times do friends ask for a ride and we’re every ready to jump up and go. Yet, if our siblings or family member’s ask, we complain about fuel… 

How many times, do our folk call and ask us when we’re coming home to visit, and we’re like ” I’ve just been so busy, there’s just no time” yet, let our colleagues ask us to catch a drink and we’re ever ready and time avails itself… 

Or, how many times does your girl or wife ask you to spend some QT (quality time) and you be like “babe, i’m so tired” but minutes later you’re gaming or catching up on social media or better still, let your boys call and say they’re coming  over and the tiredness magically disappears…

Ladies, how many times does your significant other mention things to you but half of the time you don’t hear because you’re too interested in that conversation about Keyshia’s cousin who slept with Keyshia’s man… I hope you’re following me with this.

Doesn’t it make sense? That if we cant love our families, how do we expect to love strangers? 

If we cant appreciate the little things that they do for us, how do we expect to appreciate what the world has to give us? 

If we cant respect the people who we are constantly around, how do we expect to respect people we barely know and if we cant make time for our family, how can we for any other random person?

We have generations and generations which form part of our family trees right? and more that are still to be birthed. So what we do now and how we act now has a huge impact on the people that we will bring into this world right? It’s logic.

Imagine this, we love our families, we appreciate them, we support them , we invest in them and we encourage them. These attributes will get passed down to our kids, and their kids, and their kid’s kids etc. Creating a movement of love and light which we and they will automatically share with the world. If we all did this, don’t you think the world would be a better place? I think so.

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They say that charity starts at home and I agree. The magnitude of a gesture or deed lies in the amount of heart put into it.  So let’s all make an effort to appreciate our parent’s, siblings, cousins, aunt’s, uncles, grandparents a little more than we do now. Make that cup of tea for your mom, kick that ball with your kids or nephews, draw with your nieces, catch a movie or sport with your cousins, have chill sessions with your siblings, go on date nights with your person of honour, call your folk or grand folks every now and then. It starts with you and I.

This quote really touched me and it almost felt like a wake up call because I am guilty of sometimes not loving and appreciating my family as much as I should.  You always hear me preaching about spreading love and light. So this is me beginning to put more of an effort into that and it starting with my family.

An epiphany from just an ordinary girl and that’s all thanks to Mother Teresa ♥️🙏🏼

Love, life & everything's else in between, motivation and inspiration, personal

Happiness is a choice, let’s choose it.


Many women, people in fact, go through some sought of heart break. The kind that leaves you, at the time, with no other choice but to be guarded. Guardered where you love from a distance, where you put yourself out there but only show people what you want people to see. The smile, fiesty attitude. The bling, money, cars or IDGAF attitude. It leaves you guarded where, when folk get too close, you act out and do things to push em away…because of the fear of getting hurt or feeling that heart ache again.

I’ve recently made a decision to no longer let that very fear, strip me of the things that could possibly make me the happiest. I’ve made a decision to not let that fear control my life by controlling my decisions.


 The people or persons who have caused us that heart ache are out there living their lives, moving on, and we’re always the ones left putting the pieces of the puzzle together, alone. But that’s not such a bad thing. Because we’re victors not victims. We are built for come backs. (Can I get an Amen)

You see, pain is inevitable and demands to be felt. But even pain, makes for the best teacher. One learns that the quickest way out of pain, is through it. So take ya time and work through it. 

Question: Does the person who caused you any pain deserve to still control your life long after they’re gone? 

And I’m guessing youre answer will be HELL NAH, they’ve done enough! Yeah? 

Well that’s the answer I’m looking for because they shouldn’t have that privellage. . . They shouldn’t have the privellage of guaranteeing or smirking at the fact that you won’t let anybody too close because of the fear of getting hurt again. They shouldn’t have the privellage of thinking that they’re irreplaceable and that they would never have to deal with you actually moving on and being happy and inturn them losing you. If anything, they should be feeling all of the above more!

By living in the fear of being hurt again, you pretty much allowing them to keep that power. You allow them to have that control of not pursuing the things that make YOU happy.

Let this be the day that you start controlling what impact pain has on your life and not give pain the power to control what impact it has on you. 

Let this be the day that you go back to being the best version of yourself, the uneffed version, the version that wants to be loved and wants to love freely. The version that never compromised on anything that you did. 

Let this be the day that you face that fear and you tell that fear that it will no longer rule your life , that you’re boss and you’re in control. 

Know, that this will not guarentee that you won’t get hurt again, so let that not be the expectation but, choosing happiness and a fearless life may actually be the one shot you’ve been waiting for. What more do you have to lose? They’ve already stripped you of everything before. 


I never thought I’d be in this space, where I’d wear my heart on my sleeve again. Where I’d write poetry expressing my gratitude or actually introducing him to the people closest to me. But here I am, with no guarantee that the love I’ve recently found is going to last but I’m here, loving sincerely like I would before, writing that poetry and enjoying the happiness, the gratitude, the countless attempts of him showing me how special I am to him. I’m here ready to fight like I never had, to rewire all the eish in my head and heart. I’m here ready to give this love a fair chance, to compromise, communicate, and just to love with no condition. 

I’m present and opening up myself to the blessings the almighty has put before me. I’m here opening up my heart and my soul to the happiness and respect and love and joy and the peace that my soul deserves and if it’s doesn’t work out? I can Atleast say “hey, I gave the best of me and this too shall pass once the lesson that’s meant to be taught is learnt” 


My name is Tasneem, I’ve lived through abuse, the loss of loved ones through natural causes and murder. I’ve been cheated on and divorced and I’ve lost a child all by the tender age of 23 but that doesn’t define me. 

What defines me is that I am also flaw filled, a reciprocater of love and light. I have enough of the right kind of love to go around the world and back and I am not ashamed of it. I am loyal, I have goals, I love God. What defines me is the person I’ve become because of the hurt and the pain and the fear that I once felt. 

I choose happiness, I choose peace, I choose power.

Happiness is a choice, go on now and choose it.

Love, life & everything's else in between, personal

#DFH #31

Dear future husband, 

Thank you in advance for all the things you’re gonna do for me, for the happiness, the love and the support.

Thank you in advance for you being willing to share my dreams and turning them into a reality. 

Thank you in advance for the amazing husband you’re going to be and for bringing out the best in me; thank you in advance for the beautiful kids we’re gonna have and for every mild stone that we’re going to achieve together; our home, cars, traveling or even us praying together still when eish goes south.

I cannot wait to express my gratitude for being treated like a Queen. 

Love,

Your future wife 

Love, life & everything's else in between, personal

#DFH #18

Dear future husband,

Yesterday whilst driving I saw the most beautiful thing , a father and son singing along to a song and dancing whilst driving. The dad was really into it and his son was feeding off his energy so beautifully!

I want this. I want us to be our kids’ everything for as long as we can. Can we build this foundation? Play hide and seek and sing along to their favourite songs. Can we tickle them and make them laugh just because. Can we Sit and help them with homework or cook and bake together. Can we take them with when we go out and give back to our community and  Can we show them that life is all about the simple things. 

Can they learn from watching us, how to love and how to be loved? How to respect and be respected and to have courage and be kind? Please? 

Can they love our religion watching how much we love ours,can they learn to honour God, watching us honour him and by watching how we can stand testament to and for our faith? 

I need you to be on same page as I on this.

Looking forward to building our own little empire.

Your future wife 

💋 

Love, life & everything's else in between, motivation and inspiration, personal

80/20

In a world where everything is spiraling out of control, the one thing we need to keep is our dignity and and real connections. 

When I was going through my divorce, I often heard the 80/20 rule philosophy. I didn’t quite understand it until recently. 

What I can definitely say is that I was under the impression that this philosophy only applied to boyfriend&girlfriend/husband&wife relationships…And how wrong was I. 

This philosophy can pretty much apply to ANY relationship and I fell victim, no, wait! Not victim because I AM a VICTOR, I’ll rather say that I experienced this both in a husband&wife relationship but also in relationships out side of this relation. 

Just to touch base, the 80/20 rule in relationships is as below: 

“It is the  belief that in a relationship, you’ll never get 100% of what you want, so at most you get 80%. But some other person may come along and have that missing 20% you don’t have. Some folks fall for the 20% just to realize they should’ve stayed with their original 80%.”

When you witness being “replaced” for a lack of a better word, it is emotionally draining. One literally feels lower than the scum of the earth itself and your mind just keeps running marathons. You and self have endless conversations about everything but find resolution to not a thing. 

 What I’ve learnt through my experiences though, is that if anything is meant to be, it will be so Let them go and let God! 

He found his “2-slice” chick or his ” Betty with the good hair” and they found their ” fun friends” who just ” go with the flow” ? Good on them. One thing to never do is compromise who you are to make them want to stay. It’s a mistake we often make in hope of mending our relationships. 

If he or anybody can’t accept you for who you are, flaws and all, then  I guess they really don’t deserve you and are actually doing you a favor by leaving.

Sure they may find fault and judge and point out all of your flaws and sure they will remind you about all the things YOU need to change and give their 101 excuses, take it like water off a ducks back, pray, change the things that can be changed and pray for wisdom to accept the things that can’t … I guess they do all of that  to make themselves feel better? 

Whilst I’m still yet to find out if they really do regret choosing the 20%’s, I’ve learnt to love myself unconditionally in the interim. God made no mistakes when he made me.

So, in a nutshell:

  • Keep your dignity and love yourself, and
  • Treasure the people who tolerate you day in and day out and love you even on your worse day… it’s very rare to find such these days for:


Posted by just an ordinary girl.