Love, life & everything's else in between, motivation and inspiration, personal

QOTD #75: Blessings on blessings

Today is very emotional day for me, as many of you who have shared my journey with me , would know, I lost my son at birth on this day, five years ago.

I’m getting stronger but it’s certain days that still get the better of me.

Situations have presented themselves forward, which I honestly did not have the patience and energy for and which I have been silent about because sometimes silence is best. But having being such an emotional morning, part of me wanted to react; just to vent so I could focus on celebrating my boy.

My sister said somethings to me that made so much of sense. She firstly reminded me of the person I AM. She then went on to saying

” Sissy, you can’t control what people say about you, but you can control how you react, so continue to react with patience, confidence, God and class”.

When you’ve found your peace. The devil will find ways to steal it. Don’t allow him too.

I was once very hasty and irrational and over the years I worked extremely hard to better myself with the help of my creator and family and a few friends.

I am so blessed with the people in my life, not only do they allow me to be me, flaws and all; they guide me, pick me up and step in when I can’t.

The beautiful messages I received this morning from sister and from my friends and family in support of Miks birthday, from my mum who wakes up to sing for him every year and my dad who will always come to me after and tell me to turn to God and not to cry and then my brother that would console me in his own awkward way, my boy are blessed and are forever grateful and I thank each of you.

To my dearest Lori. Thank you for the surprise visit to Miks grave and the video call and for making it look so beautiful. I couldn’t be there and even with all going on with you, you found it to make time and make a plan to do this for us. I am forever grateful

May God bless each and every one of you who remembered us today with bountiful favour and blessings.

It’s a day that reminded me of some very important lessons and it would never have happened if my angel was not in heaven.

Thank you friends and family and God for the constant support, the reminders and the lessons.

A gratitude post from just an ordinary Mum of angel!

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Love, life & everything's else in between, motivation and inspiration, personal

#QOTD #48

I got this random message from one of my closest girlfriends the other morning and it just made me realize how important it is for one to choose the people they keep around them. This message literally brightened up my whole day.



Tonight, I got invited by another close girl friend of mine to attend a fundraiser for such an amazing organization. I’m busy working on doing some research on this phenomenal org and will definitely be sharing it with you all. The night comprised local and international acts of singing, poetry and comedy. All in the name of encouraging normal folk like you and I to get involved do our part in making our community a better place to live and grow in. But I will dedicate an entire post to giving the 411 on this amazing org.

Moving along, These two gestures from my girlfriends have inspired the quote of today:

Associate yourself with people of good quality. For it is better to be alone than in bad company

~ Booker T Washington 

I absolutely agree. 

You are, who you hang around with and that’s a fact.

We often hear the old folk say : if you lie with dogs, you bound to wake up with fleas. They knew what they were talking about. 

I’ve got a lot of wrongs to right, but one thing I’ve always been blessed with, is my support structure. My circle of real friends has grown significantly smaller over the years, but the bond between my friends and I, has grown so much stronger. 

We are each other’s strength, courage, sight, logic, comic, sister, stylist, driver, shrink, cheer leader, confidence, entertainment and even a target. The beauty lies in that even when we make each other so mad, when it comes to the wire, we don’t  have to question who will be there and who wouldn’t. 

These are the people we need in our lives, the ones who we can love when they’re down and when they’re up and the ones who can love us at our worst through to us being our best. 

Your friends should ultimately push you to be and do better. And I can confidently say that mine do all of the above, even when I’m stubborn as a Muel. 

So on that note, let’s take some time  to reflect on the people we deem close to us. Let’s look at the character of the people we call friends pay more attention to those whom we let into our circle. It may seem trivial, but it is so important.


❤️and 🌈 from just an ordinary girl 

Girl power, Love, life & everything's else in between, motivation and inspiration, personal, Photography

#QOTD #45

When women support each other, incredible things happen 

~ unknown 

Right? I don’t even need to dissect this any further but I’ll enhance on it. 

You don’t need to stand and address an arena filled with women to encourage, inspire or support each other . You don’t have wait until you’re an Oprah or mother Theresa of a nation to start valuing and encouraging women to be the best they can be or to “lead” women away from the superficial crap we consume ourselves with.

A few girlfriends and I planned a mini road trip and one night slumber not far from home. People honestly thought that we were in some foreign place because of all of the amazing pics we posted, but those were just BTWs.

The place we visited
Brekkie @ vovo telo

The significance of the trip was to break away from reality and just to recoop. The trip was planned to act  as a reset button. Time to stop. Reflect and then start again.

Sentimental tokens from each other that we left with

Not everybody knew each other however, all were friends of mine. I suggested  these ladies because I know all of them personally and I know the journeys we’ve all travelled and the destinations we all hoping to reach. So with Des’s idea for the road trip and us all confirming, it was a recipe for success!

The weekend was beyond refreshing and went off smoothly, we all focused on the most important things; being our selves and sharing perspectives to enhance each other’s thought processes, sharing each other’s joys and then becoming more sensitive to the battles that us women face. We chilled, laughed, expressed, ate, cooked, embraced and loved! Oh and posed 😜

Because food is life
Girls just wanna have fun ♥️
 

I will be the first to say that I left that weekend away with loads of gratitude, a wider perspective, beautiful memories, fun photos and sisters for life…yes, we’re already planning our next one.
The most beautiful thing for me is that we’re all so similar yet so different. We don’t all belong to the same religion, don’t all have kids, husbands or boyfriends but we had such an amazing time.

Our Sunday in pics, the boys even popped in!

That’s all you need to encourage and support your fellow women; spend quality time with them for the sake of bettering yourself and them and then the rest automatically falls into place. We had no time for gossip, judgment, shade throwing, scandling , fighting or any cattish behavior.

‘Coz what’s a slumber without novelty bedroom slippers

So! Write your fellow women a note, dedicate a status or throw in a motivating hashtag to a pic. Go for a picnic, take a drive , catch a movie or even stay home and cook and for or bake. Pout. Anything! But start.

Imagine a world where our women are dedicated to building each other up as opposed to tearing each other down. It seems beautiful, amazing, strong and all things nice to me.

❤️ and 🌈🔥 from just an ordinary girl

Love, life & everything's else in between, motivation and inspiration, personal

#QOTD #31

There is one element of  any relationship, that’s importance is often overlooked: That element being Communication.

Many of us don’t see the importance or relevance of communication; stating our intention, saying what we feel, checking in with a loved one or giving a heads up to our significant other when we can’t make that normal routine dinner, chat, movie etc.

A little bit of communication goes such a long way. 

Today’s quote is based on this concept:

Tony Gaskin beautifully said:

Communication to a relationship is like oxygen to life. Don’t suffocate your relationship by not communicating.

See how important it is? 

To those of you who really feel like: 

“if I don’t call or Text or make time to see you, I have a very good reason and I expect you to understand.”

Here’s what I have to say to you:

We, are not. mind readers!

Don’t have such great expectations because I can guarantee that half of the time you’re going to be disappointed.

I am a very literal person, I don’t like to assume and so sometimes those around me get bugged because I will ask THE most literal of questions just to ensure that I have all the facts before I comment or say what or how I feel. I learnt to be this way because in my previous relationships, communication was blatantly overlooked. It was selective and conditional. It was for this reason that through my self reflection journey,  I made a promise to myself that any relationship that may come after, be it a friendship, courtship or marriage, communication will not be conditional or inconsistent and that I will ensure that I hold up to my end. All in the name of growing and learning from past mistakes.

I see all kinds relationships fail daily because of a lack of communication. Because one feels “oh why bother” 

Dearest one, never have that attitude! If you’re in a any relationship you have a right to be heard, for your feelings to be respected, and for your views to be considered. If you don’t, I can almost guarantee you will fester feelings of resentment and negativity. But who would you possibly blame for that? If you are not telling somebody how you feel about certain things, how are they going to know it makes you feel a certain way? 

What I’ve learnt though, is the ones who feel “why bother” often say that because they don’t want to be wrong or to take accountability for their part. Yes, I said it. I’ve witnessed it. It becomes too much for them to bare that there are things they can improve on and they almost feel like they have so much going on, how are they supposed to fix this as well. Often they’re going through other things in their lives and it all becomes too much.

All I can say is that it is a beautiful thing when you overcome an issue through communicating. It’s so fulfilling.

I think it is the peak of respect for a relationship and a person when you two have a safe space created with each other, by each other and for each other where you can state your inner most feelings towards certain things and work towards it. 

Is it always easy? Hell no! Nothing that’s ever good for you comes easy. If anything, it’s easier to just say “forget about it” well let me just say, I’m not about that forgetting life. It’s damn hard work. You sometimes end up sounding like a scratched record, and feel like you’re fighting a losing battle but trust me, with the good intention of your relationship, it will soon pay off. Especially if both persons are that much dedicated to making that friendship, relationship, marriage or family tie last. 

Communication is a fundamental building block in the foundation of any relationship. Do not take its essence for granted. 

May we all strive to communicate better ❤️

Some insight, from just an ordinary girl 

Love, life & everything's else in between, motivation and inspiration, personal

Thank you 

It’s that time of the year again where I show gratitude to everybody who wished me and Mik well. 

It was a first for me this year, not taking leave for Boy’s birthday. And even I underestimated the support I would receive.

My dearest famo and friends. Thank you all for the beautiful messages of well wishes for my boy and strength for me. The profile picture updates. The constant check-ins. With friends and family like you guys , no burden is too heavy. Shukr to Allah! 

My work fam, the beautiful card and bag of goodies brought on the tears even more. I appreciate you guys so much. You guys made my day at work all the more bearable. I only hope that I am given the opportunity to be there for all of you like you have for me.

My family; mother, sister, cousins. I appreciate the wishes from China. My mum never misses singing for her grandson even if she’s on the other side of the world. My sister for the kind wishes and cousins for thinking of me. 

Stephz, you were there for me the actual day I lost Mik , you made sure you tracked my number down and called me. Years later, and I still get messages from you on Miks birthday, thank you my friend. I love you tons.

Lamz, you called first thing in the morning and had his pic up. You and layla and the kids really made it special. Appreciate you in so many ways.

My ex in laws, I appreciate the messages sent. Thank you (: 

My trishy, thank you for coming home and cooking me supper and just existing with me. I appreciated that so much! You really are a special kind my friend. 

Here are some of the wishes sent :

My beautiful card made by my team ❤

Love, life & everything's else in between, personal

#DFH #36

Dear future husband,

Some of the very important people in my life are guys. Yes, I have boys as friends; true friends.

Would this be a problem? I really hope not because I know that when you meet them, you will appreciate them as much as I. 

They have helped see me through some hectic parts of my life. They inspire me to do and be better each day in my pursuits to follow what I love doing.

I look forward to hearing your thoughts on this. For now though, it’s the day of Jumua so Juma Mubarak my love and may peace and blessings be upon you always Xx

Your future wife ❤️

Love, life & everything's else in between, motivation and inspiration

#DFH #29

Dear future husband,

I’ve had help becoming the women that I am today. The people in my circle played a huge and fundamental role in my healing process and also just in terms of me working towards being better than I was yesterday.

Would you support me when I want to or rather need to return the favour to them? Will you celebrate them with me and appreciate the value that they’ve added, are adding and will probably add to my existence in the future? 

This is so huge for me because loyalty is a big thing for me and everyone who is in my circle now, has been here for years. 

Besides, they’re experts when it comes to me, they’ve been exposed to my moods , my flaws and my good days; who better to learn from 😊
I really would appreciate it if you are able and willing to do this with me.

Wishing you a Godly, wonderful , positive- filled vibed week. 

Loving you already,

Your future wife