Love, life & everything's else in between, personal

#DFH #33

Dear future husband, 

Know that I am aware of all of my flaws and try my hardest to never run away or deny them. 

You will soon learn that I am extremely passionate about things that I deem close to me. Passionate about my likes and dislikes. About certain views and topics. I can be domineering and can also be very opinionated. I try not to impose my opinions on others however, sometimes this can be mistaken or delivered in such a way because of how passionate I am about a specific view/ topic. It is never done to intentionally force my view or opinion on you, if anything I almost enjoy not having people agree with me because it opens me up to perspective.

I can be very bold and am loud spoken and can sometimes be abit too honest ; this is only because I wanna keep things 100 all the time, especially with those close to me.

If this is something that may peeve you  , I apologies in advance because the intention is never that; to peeve you. 

You are always welcome to bring this to my attention and I will gladly accept and work towards not making you feel peeved.

I try to be as true and transparent as I can be even if it’s something that others may dislike. But it is me and I am a working progress. 

I pray and ask God to help me overcome my flaws but I nor you were meant to be perfect. So there probably will always be something’s that would just irk you about me….hope that won’t be reason for you to leave but rather for you stay 🙂

Thanking you in advance for your patience and understanding,

Your future wife 

Love, life & everything's else in between, motivation and inspiration, personal

Tay sighs 

Have you ever gotten to the point where you just ready to give up? Coz that’s the point where I am at.
I think this has been the worst, most emotional week of 2016.

 My drive and passion at work is at an all time low. My relationship with my mother is pretty much non existent and God knows how much I miss her. I don’t have the will to just read Quraan and sit on my musalaah. It’s like Shaytaan is winning and I’m just letting him win. 

Whenever any hardships hit me, before looking and seeing what others have done to me, I generally see and take what I could have done better and try to better myself… But Gawsh! They were right when they said old habits die hard and it’s like the more you trying to be better, more and more things happen and it just cripples you more. N nobody has the patience or time to help you grow, it’s all on you.

I feel as though I’m constantly having to watch what I say and how I say and what I do and when I do it both at work and at home.

I sometimes feel like I’m not allowed to have time out . Or get irritated . Or tired . Or feel like I just don’t wanna do anything. Have you ever felt like this? 

I know that I have flaws, and plenty might I add, and it’s like whilst im trying to be less judgmental and accept the flaws of others, the more mine are been picked on. I guess this is the test when you trying to  be better and you just got to humble yourself and suffer the consequences and continue making dua for Allah ta Allah to rectify your flaws.

I’m at a point where my thinking brain is dead. I don’t have the answers and the more I try the more I fail. But if I don’t try I feel it’s making my situations worse. 

Have you ever felt like this? What did you do to get out of feeling this way?

Comment post and share, let’s help each other.

Posted from just an ordinary girl