Love, life & everything's else in between, personal

Slamaat on your 6th birthday Mika’il

Six years. You would have been six years.

I thought time would have healed me abit and by now I’d be abit more stable when your birthday comes… I guess I was wrong. I think time has taught me to keep myself distracted, but on days like this, it’s impossible.

I try to celebrate you, in fact, I celebrate you daily. You have pushed me to be the woman with characteristics of the mother I would have wanted to be to you. Each time I’m In a situation, I think “what example would I be leaving if Mika’il were here”.

Precious child, you have made such an impact in my life. I really thank Allah that he chose me to carry you.

Flashbacks of the day that I lost you came flooding in from 01:05am when my sleep broke this morning.

As much as I trust Allah had different plans for you, I still question if you’d be here if only I had made different decisions or if only I stayed off my feet and rested as I should have.

But anyway, you would have been six today. Lol no guessing that I would have been way more excited than you. You would have also started big school. Gawsh, I don’t think they make phones big enough to house all the photos I’d take of you daily. I often wonder how it would have been; me coming home to help you with homework, teach you. You going to madressa and learning more about your religion. I often wonder what type of questions you’d be asking me.

I often wonder… I do that alot actually.

So on your special day. Know that mum and a whole lot of aunts and uncles, cousins, Junaid and Ma & PA are thinking of you. I know you’re in a much better place my son.

The love I have for you will never die. Till we meet again sweet child.

Slamaat on your sixth heavenly birthday.

Love and light always,

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Girl power, Love, life & everything's else in between, motivation and inspiration, personal, quotes

The truth about every strong woman… Would you love her still?

You watch her do her, as best she can. Fiercely she takes on challenges one after the other; and boy are you drawn to this; her fight.

You study her, the way she walks, talks, smiles, walks into a room and steals the hearts of those around her; turning a dark room into a brightly lit ball of energy.

You admire her courage, her living life to the fullest; you see all of her pictures on social media, checking in with her closest friends, having the time of their lives and you can’t help but want to be apart of it all.

You hear about how fierce she is at the office, how she stands firm for the things she believes in. You love that she speaks her mind, and confidently so and is so passionate about the things and people close to her… and you can’t help but want to be in a closest of circles.

We all know someone like her, don’t we?

But what many don’t know is that you only seewhat she wants you to see.

What you don’t know, is what got her to that point, how many tears she cried to get to a point where she promised herself that she will NEVER depend on anyone else, but herself, for her own happiness.

You don’t know what toughened her and made her Ray Charles to the BS and all that’s superficial around her. You don’t know what broke her only to build her stronger than before.

She wears pain like a pearl necklace around her neck and often that distracts how scared and anxious she really feels inside.

You don’t know what abuse she succumbed that numbed her and hence now she’s living life to the fullest.

You see behind every strong, independent woman, is a story of hurt, pain, anger; struggle. There’s a story of sacrifice and strength.

You see this beautiful Bella but when you’re close enough, the cracks start showing, the anxiety and vulnerability start over flowing. She’s okay in her own because she knows self will never let her down.

Will you still want to befriend or love her then? When she’s not so strong and the cracks become more visible. on some days. Would you still want to be amongst her closest?

She knows strength. She’s TKO’d pain and she’s overcome heartbreak.

Let’s take a moment to acknowledge and celebrate a strong woman today.

Love and light, from just an ordinary strong woman.