It’s never too late to be what you might have been.
With life’s rollercoaster ride, it’s sometimes so easy to get lost amongst the chaos. We lose our spark; that very thing we were known for. Then situations like marriage, kids, health or financial constraints occur and sometimes we lose all hope.
It’s important to remeber that you can be anything you want to be. Passion. Perseverance and prayer is the formular. (P to the 3rd power) 😁
Before I reached 20 I was looking to be one of the top umcoming journos. I was 6 months short of my diploma and then life happened. I didn’t finishh diploma. Married, divorced, lost a child and two grans and I felt my world coming to a halt.
9 years later…yeap soon to be 29 (I don’t know how to feel about that just yet? and it is only now that I can see myself evolving. I’m working to get my spark back. To be as influential as I was once. I’m working to being the best version of myself yet.
I challenge you to do the same 💪
Love and light always, from just an ordinary girl.
Can I just commend the folk involved in rescuing this baby and the many other abandoned babies out there. And an even huger thank you to all the baby and kiddies homes out there. You guys are making a difference!
As always, majority of our community members used this opportunity to judge, belittle and curse the mother of this baby without knowing who abandoned the baby or what the mother’s situation was. I for one, felt for that baby. As a woman who has lost a kid and is looking to have my own soon, my heart bled for that little girl and I could somewhat understand the anger and frustration from everyone but till an extent.
For me, my heart bled even more for the mother of that baby. I kept thinking and wondering what space she must have been in to do something like that. I kept wondering how desperate she must have been in.
Personally, I know what difficult situations can do and the state they can sometimes leave you in… And not all of us deal with these difficulties or aftermaths in the same manner.
I mean I know God has a plan and part of me felt like he knew that he would protect that baby and so I couldn’t help but think that just maybe it all happened because this mum needs help.
As women we often go through so much and yet it becomes so easy for us to tear someone else down without knowing their story. Imagine if that was your sister, niece, cousin or friend… and you knew nothing about what they were facing but came to hear of it after. Would you still judge as harshly as you are now?
As a community, our first reaction is to judge from behind a phone or keyboard. That’s one of our biggest problems; quick to vent and complain but not many put their hands up to actually change a situation.
We become vial and suddenly play the roles of being sinless or holier than thou. We forget that there may be things that we are not particularly proud of that we may have done, be it an affair, sex before marriage, gossiping, lying, stealing, drugging, murder etc etc…you can see where I’m going with this.
It is so important to know that opinions are just that and they never warrant us judging someone just because they sin differently to us, especially without knowing all the facts.
We fail to think that maybe this is an opportunity for us as a community to change and become more proactive. Look at the devil.
Maybe if this mom knew that her community would stand by her through what ever she was going through as opposed to knowing how we usually judge and so would judge her irrespective, or even knowing how she’d be blasted on social media(because that’s what we do) , just maybe the outcome would have been different.
We use our energy on prying on other people’s pain,… Maybe to prevent us from actually looking at ourselves and taking accountability for the wrongs we’ve done. You don’t call that justice. It’s actually pathetic. We complain about racism, sexism, terrorism but oppression towards people who make mistakes, or suffer from mental disorders or feel like they don’t have any other way out becomes okay…how messed up is that. And even if they are “whores” or whatever else one might call them… It is not our place to judge.
I’d like for something positive to come out of this, even if it is just awareness.
WE know that there are alternatives to dumping unwanted kids… But for someone battling a mental illness or disorder or going through a difficult time… sometimes their judgment is clouded.
Can we circulate alternatives? Letting distressed mums to be or mums who feel they don’t have options, know that they actually do have options?
Mothers can leave their unwanted babies at a baby safe. There is an organization dedicated to making baby safes to prevent babies being abandoned. For more information or even if you’d like to sponsor, please click here or you can google The baby safe.
There are baby safes on the Bluff. In Amanzimtoti, PMB and Durban North.
And if you you are anywhere else in the country, the website has a list of baby safes in other provinces as well.
If you know of any other way, like Crisis Centre information or where people can find out more about family planning and contraceptives etc. Please comment below or share it on your social media platforms, in your community or even at your work place?
We need to take our community back and we are only as strong as our weakest link… Let that sink in.
Love and light always, from just an ordinary community member.
You watch her do her, as best she can. Fiercely she takes on challenges one after the other; and boy are you drawn to this; her fight.
You study her, the way she walks, talks, smiles, walks into a room and steals the hearts of those around her; turning a dark room into a brightly lit ball of energy.
You admire her courage, her living life to the fullest; you see all of her pictures on social media, checking in with her closest friends, having the time of their lives and you can’t help but want to be apart of it all.
You hear about how fierce she is at the office, how she stands firm for the things she believes in. You love that she speaks her mind, and confidently so and is so passionate about the things and people close to her… and you can’t help but want to be in a closest of circles.
We all know someone like her, don’t we?
But what many don’t know is that you only seewhat she wants you to see.
What you don’t know, is what got her to that point, how many tears she cried to get to a point where she promised herself that she will NEVER depend on anyone else, but herself, for her own happiness.
You don’t know what toughened her and made her Ray Charles to the BS and all that’s superficial around her. You don’t know what broke her only to build her stronger than before.
She wears pain like a pearl necklace around her neck and often that distracts how scared and anxious she really feels inside.
You don’t know what abuse she succumbed that numbed her and hence now she’s living life to the fullest.
You see behind every strong, independent woman, is a story of hurt, pain, anger; struggle. There’s a story of sacrifice and strength.
You see this beautiful Bella but when you’re close enough, the cracks start showing, the anxiety and vulnerability start over flowing. She’s okay in her own because she knows self will never let her down.
Will you still want to befriend or love her then? When she’s not so strong and the cracks become more visible. on some days. Would you still want to be amongst her closest?
She knows strength. She’s TKO’d pain and she’s overcome heartbreak.
Let’s take a moment to acknowledge and celebrate a strong woman today.
Love and light, from just an ordinary strong woman.
Whilst there have been some very exciting milestones that occurred, it has been THE most stressful year by far… Check my blogging activity and you’ll agree.
Throughout everything that has happend, I almost lost myself. I allowed situations to define me. I allowed the built up frustration and anger to poison my thoughts. Heck I was almost even ready to stoop down to levels I swore I’d never go too.
Two hospital admissions, a court order and several encounters later… The drama still persisted. But something had to give and it gave indeed.
Whilst I won’t go into detail about the drama or even the betrayal. I would just like to touch base on something that became so apparent and is by far my biggest gripe with 2018.
Woman bashing…by women.
I think I was so alarmed that such women existed that I started questioning whether I was sane. I couldn’t and still find it hard to believe that there are women out here who literally spend time, lots of it, planning to destroy or make someone’s life a misery. Like do these people not fear God. Have they never felt peace and true happiness?
I mean how do you hate someone you’ve never met? How do you use someone’s past painful experiences to intentionally try to inflict more pain. How do you use everything in your way to purposely break another women’s spirit. If I was some weakling I’d either be in jail or a mad house.
This is what is wrong with the world first before the Trumps or Zumas. It’s us women. We hate it when its done to us but it’s justifiable to do it to someone else. We’d never accept if it were done to our daughters, sisters or besties but we encourage our sons to do it to their wives or friends to do it to someone else. We speak about being Godfearing but we ignore God’s messages.
It became so clear that women are so quick to judge fellow women but when we or one of our friends are in the same boat, we get enraged.
Our sons see this, and think it’s okay to do it because mom, sister or cousin does it. Our daughters see this and grow up thinking it’s okay to women bash.
We as women set ourselves up for failure. It’s pathetic. It’s shameful. It’s common and It’s sad. We birth nations. It’s time we stop focusing on the wrongs of others; men, fellow women etc. and start fixing ourself.
Heck it’s 2019. Peace and happiness should be the order of this year. Drama and all things negative are to be left in the past.
My prayer for every women reading this and for those who are guilty of this behavior is that you heal, that God allows you peace and true joy.
I pray that we as women become so busy with fixing ourselves that we have no time to tear each other down. I pray that God keeps us busy and focused on our own families and goals so that the devil doesn’t have a chance to toy with us. I pray for change, for all of us. Aaameeen.
What other people think of me is none of my business.
Don’t lose yourself and remeber a queen never leaves her throne to address peasants throwing stones.
Love and light always, feelings of just an ordinary girl