It has been said, on more than one occassion, that my standards are too high when it comes to dating…
Being in the process of self reconstruction, part of me, just for a jif, considered perhaps that it just might be so.
But then I asked why? Why are they too high? The better part of me still felt that my standards are reasonable. I mean I once settled, and 1 and a half years later found myself a statistic; divorced. Its now 2 years since and im finding myself going back to the basics, which isnt a bad thing I suppose.
You see, these past few days, 3 to be exact,have been THE worst days of 2016. Health wise and mentally, all downhill. Whilst progress has been made and seen in some aspects of my life, my overall demeanor was and still is unsettled. Ive been put off sick from work and in these 3 days my dad has shown me that my standards are in fact just fine. Let me tell you why!
My whole family has been rather supportive during this time. However, my father in particular basically took over doing all of my and many of the house hold chores. His been doing my washing, by hand might I add, cleaning, spotlessy! and has resorted to buying things that didnt require me to “cook” perse’. He buys my “monthly’s” to cater for the that time when a certain, unpleasant Aunt, Suzie is her name, comes to visit. He’S 52 and is self employed and so getting an early start to his day is imperative.Yet his been leaving home well after 8 ensuring that theres literally nothing left for me to do #MayGodBlessHim.
This is not as a result of me not being domesticated or the lack there of. He sure as hell brought us up to cook, clean and hustle all with pride,courage and humility…He did this because his daughter, a love of his, simply was not well enough to juggle everything else plus the chores in this time.
When something was and is wrong we speak. When I or any body else in our home goes “off the rails” he (and mum) guides us back to where we need to be. When we achieve, even the littlest of things, he is there celebrating that e/very success as if it were his own and when all things jaded set in, he encourages us to get back up and keep going, mum actually does a better job at that lol! He is always there pushing us towards God, when times are good and when times are bad and even when we dont, he judges us not!
Now dont get me wrong, his dad, not mum and so he gets things wrong lol. He can sometimes forget my birthday, he isnt big on birthdays in his defense, his dad passed away on his and so its understandable. He is human after all and so imperfections are definately present.Its a give and take!
And so I found myself asking why! why should I or any other single out there settle for anything less? Surely this kinda love still exists? This love that allows you to be courageous and kind, that allows you to think and prioritise that which is important to you. The love that when needed, encourages you to be selfless. The love that communicates, celebrates and most importantly pushes you towards God. Imagine if we all loved this way.
Am I silly for thinking that this love can still be found. That there is somebody out there who shares the exact same sentiment? Maybe I am…and maybe im not! Im no profressional when it comes to all of this but I once read that patience is a virtue and so I wont settle just yet.
I will have the courage to wait, even although 30 is around the corner, I will have faith knowing that he and God will know that its not material things my heart is after and I will stay true to myself and work on being a better me in the interim.Which will allow me to love this way.
Can a love like this exist outside of a family relation? I guess we will just have to wait and see.
Whats your take?